Dark Swan
by bizzabel
Summary: She's never been the black sheep of the family but when Bella's friends Rosalie and Alice want to be cool & will do anything for it, she's thrown in at the deeps end. And when her mom comes home in the middle of it, she doesn't just bring bad luck.. HUMAN
1. Chapter 1

_**More summary: **__Bella, Alice and Rose live a secluded life in Forks, they live like average teens but suddenly – or so it seems – Rose doesn't want average any more. With problems ranging from Cullens, LaPlush friends, parents with their own problems, and a little more "rock n roll" than manageable, it's no wonder Bella is having troubles..._

_I'm back! Sorry I haven't done any stories for ages, and I haven't yet done a squeal to my story Cullens Behaving Badly because I've been so busy but I really wanted a go at writing a story like this. It was my birthday yesterday so this is my present to you... you can review as a present to me. Hope you enjoy! Xxx PS I don't own Twilight. Yet._

**Chapter 1**

Alice pouted at me defensively before stuffing the picture back into her pocket. We sat in the sun talking and joking, doing homework and eating the Hale housekeeper's home baked goodies like every other Sunday afternoon, just me, Alice and Rose.

"Next week," Rose mulled, "let's do something different." It was the start of the new school term, to be precise, the first term of our senior year. We'd already been to school on Friday to find out our new classes and deal with all the administration, but Rose had been off all day, and now I wondered weather this was why.

"We could shop!" Alice exclaimed, always happy to partake in her favourite past-time.

I rolled my eyes, Saturdays were reserved for the mall or an outing with one of our families, they always had, but I was open to something new - I was nearly eighteen!

"Come on guys, there's got to be something really good to do. People at school always seem to have great weekends." Again, this was so true, nobody at high school ever seemed bored because they had _somebody_ to share with.

"You really need new boots and those were in the sale and they'll be gone before I can get them for your birthday!" Alice begged, speaking so fast it was hard to follow, she referred to the picture of the stunning catwalk model wearing ridiculous suede boots that Alice had been waving about a few seconds earlier.

"Hey, actually you're right," said Rose, through a mouthful of muffin, "Everyone at high school seems pretty cool so why don't we just hang with a new crowd?" Rose's eyes weren't quite matching the enthusiasm in her voice. The thing was, our other favourite thing to do was watch _them_. Edward, Emmett and Jasper. The three single most beautiful, popular and fantasised guys in school; completely in their own league, living an incomparable life to us. They wouldn't want anything to do with us. Not any more.

"I'm not sure," Alice reasoned, "I mean, we'd still need a new wardrobe for new friends right?"

"Come on Alice. We don't need to shop all the time. I'm running low on allowance money anyway." I said, knowing it was impossible to reason with my two rich best friends.

"Don't be stupid Bella, if we're going to be cool, we may as well look the part." Rose snapped.

_Isabella Swan_. That's me, a completely inappropriate name. A rose is beautiful, and although Rose never flaunted it, she was so utterly stunning. Alice means dear, kind and noble; all quantities that Alice posses. But Isabella Swan? A beautiful, prosperous beast. Yeah right.

I sat back in the long, damp grass of the park letting Rose and Alice plan out another stupid plan.

"So we should go shopping after school this week for outfits and we can get the stuff online..."

"...Yeah and Mom can get the stuff too..."

".... It's gonna be a great _party_."

That single word bought me out of my latest day dream of Edward and back to the real world, "_WHAT?"_

"Cool it Bella, we're gonna hold a party." Rose said, grabbing my shoulder to stop me from getting up. Parties were _so_ not my thing, let alone holding them.

They gave me a minute to register the information. How bad could it be, we could make loads of new friends in theory, "I guess," I said, letting a strained smile play on the corners of my mouth, "If we invite the drama crowd they could probably get a karaoke going or the arty table look quite fun."

They stared at me in utter horror.

"Are. You. Kidding. Me?" Rose asked slowly, Alice in chorus, "Bella, if I'm going to spend the entire contents of my saving account on a party do you really think I would invite the _nerds_." Rose said nerds like venom, it actually stung me, it wasn't like our cafeteria table was over crowded either.

"Well your inviting me right?" I asked, not knowing what came over me so suddenly.

"Sorry, I figured you knew what I meant by _cool_ new crowd?" Rose said, "We could even tackle the Cullens, unless _you're _too cool for them?" she said. It cut deep and she knew why.

For a second I thought she would apologise but she never did so I got up, grabbing my old truck keys and drove back to my house without a second glance. They would forgive me, and I would them, we would be best friends again within an hour.

Once I was safety sitting in my kitchen with a strawberry shake from the fridge I set my phone on the counter and waited for it to buzz. After a record length of forty minutes a text appeared from Alice, '_do u wanna b in the plan or not?' _No kiss, no sorry. I contemplated my response for a few minutes before reluctantly punching '_yes'_ into the keyboard. '_Fine, cya at school.'_ Came back the unfeeling reply in seconds. Disheartened I threw the rest of my second shake into the trash and past the rest of the evening watching TV distantly before escaping from my dad Charlie when he got back from the bar at eleven. He looked like he was going to say something, but whatever it was I was sure it could wait.

Morning came, it always did never mind what anyone said the day before. After Alice's texts I didn't wait for a lift though, because from the tone of the messages would be waiting for a non-existent lift. So I drove myself to school by myself and saw Alice and Rose across the parking lot climbing out Rose's new bright red and flashy convertible she had begged _daddy_ for.

"Hey!" I called across the lot. They pretended they couldn't hear me, "Hey sexy!" I called again.

Not resisting a compliment Rose turned instantly, I at once noticed she wasn't wearing her usual jeans, jumper and charitable tote, but instead a long checked shirt, iridescent leggings and a leather satchel. I wondered if it was something her fashionable brothers had sent back from Italy but then Alice walked round from the other side of the ostentatious car and she had her black spiky hair piled up with thousands of tiny grips and a cashmere dress.

I straight away felt under dressed, even after I'd made an effort that morning to curl my fairly ordinary brown hair, "Don't shout Bella. You look so weird." Rose said in way of greeting.

Alice gave me a quick smile before resuming her cucumber cool façade. She took a step closer to my side, guiding me in the way of the bathrooms. I followed, wondering if I would get an apology for last night in the privacy of the loos.

Once we arrived Alice perched on the basin and Rose fixed her lip gloss, "Here," Alice said simply, gesturing I take of my grey zip hoodie. I did as directed and stood awkwardly in my white tank top. Alice rolled her eyes at me and handed me a similar zip hoodie. The only noticeable difference being the price tag and the words _'Abercrombie and Fitch'_ sewn onto the front. Then after assessing me again she unwound a scruffy, but undoubtedly new deep blue scarf from her bag and gave it to me as well.

"I would have picked you out some more stuff but my alarm didn't go," Alice said with a little grin as she started to line my eyes with a brown pencil and gesturing for me to finish with mascara, "not too much." she added passing me a brand new tube.

I was still waiting for the big apologies but Alice gave me another quick smile passed me more make-up – something I only ever wore at weekends or on a photo day – and then grabbing my hand a tugging me towards the home room as the warning bell went.

Standing in front of Forks High School's largest classroom, number 5, Rose pulled a piece of folded note paper out her bag. We stood outside the door in silence, I wondered if they were waiting for someone else to enter the classroom but when Mr Berty the English teacher walked in, giving us a lopsided look as he walked up the steps, we remained, Alice and Rose focused on looking vaguely preoccupied but _very_ available.

"Guys, don't you think we should get to lessons already?" I muttered, wondering if it was alright to say anything or if they were doing some sort of 'cool ritual'.

"Fashionably late," Alice replied, so subtly that I could hardly tell she said it, her chiming voice nearly lost in the wind.

Finally, a split second after the bell went we jogged up the four steps and into the class room, then smoothly towards the back row. I noticed Rose drop the note paper on a desk as we passed one of the cheerleaders.

Slumping down into the seats I noticed, who else was coming in _fashionably late_, the Cullens entered, nodding at Mr Berty as they passed. They sat down a little way off us, Emmett didn't seem to mind us being there, his chiselled face didn't so much as crumple in question when he acknowledged us, Jasper's huge eyes flicked in confusion that we were right on top of his seats. The most beautiful though, Edward, dropped his eyes, his golden hair flicking forward, annoyed we stole his seats? I almost laughed allowed, wondering why on earth something so simple as seats would ever matter to somebody like that.

After being told off for our apparent lateness in home period (the Cullens weren't even spoken to mind) and we were kept late for our first period Spanish I kicked Rose in the shin, "What the hell was that all about? And the note? Why the hell will _cheerleaders_ suddenly want to come to our parties?"

"After all you've done I'm not sure how much this is _your_ party!" Rose snapped back, "and besides, the note is anonymous, they were too busy chatting to see me drop it and let's face it, my address is just a tad exclusive." I nodded in humble agreement, Rose smiled just a tiny bit, "Sorry, I just want this to work."

It was only a small smile under the mountain of shiny strawberry lippy. It was enough though. One tiny smile to prove I hadn't completely lost a best friend.


	2. Chapter 2

_Chapter 2!!! Hope you like, it's longer the first... please review xx_

**Chapter 2**

The morning pasted slowly, I couldn't help but wonder what Rose and Alice had said and planned in between my abrupt departure last night and Alice's brisk texts. When we finally got a chance to talk at lunch they seemed distant again, and I could feel the cool radiating off them, "OK give it up guys! I need to know what's going on." I asked eventually.

Alice looked at me for a minute with a vaguely amused expression, "What you mean this morning to home room? Fashionably late mean much to you Bella?"

Rose grinned condescendingly and in my distraction a large blob of mayonnaise dribbled out my sandwich and onto the hoodie Alice had given me earlier, "Oh my gosh Alice! I'm sorry I'll get it cleaned for you."

Alice grinned a little more this time, "The hoodie's yours to keep. My gift."

Letting the information soak for a minute my face probably resembled a goldfish, "But Alice, did you even see that price tag?"

Alice shrugged again and launched into an animated conversation about the porche her daddy was buying her for the new semester and the pros and cons of having it blue or yellow. Leaving me, completely clueless about cars, let alone aluminium and anti-rust paints, thankful I had Jacob back in LaPlush to keep my Chevy running.

Thinking about Jacob bought me back to my sullen thoughts about Alice and Rose's, weird behaviour. He was my little sunshine, cheering me up and keeping my feet on the ground – not that I ever had anything to get big headed about though. I resolved to go and visit him tonight and ask him what he thought about it all. He would see it fairly, or at least quite fairly from his unfair life-long grudge for Rose.

I distracted myself for the rest of the afternoon by slipping my ipod headphones up my sleeve so I could be far away in biology and hiding in the changing rooms through gym. I waved back to Alice and Rose, although if they saw me I'm not sure. I turned to keys in the ignition of my truck after what seemed like years and speed down the highway hoping Charlie, aka Dad, aka Forks Chief Police wasn't on lookout duty.

I could hear the sounds of Jacob in his shed when I arrived his and Billy's tiny bungalow and gratefully grabbed some sodas before I went to find him, "Hey Jake?" I called.

A head popped out from under the bonnet of a little red car, "Bells! I didn't know you were about today," he grinned and hugged me with his greasy, strong arms. With Jacob here I wasn't so worried about getting Alice's fancy hoodie grubby, "What graces me with your presence?" Jacob asked jokingly.

I couldn't lie, let alone to Jacob so I told it straight, "It's Alice and... Rose," Jacob hissed quietly at the name, "Don't be so nasty!" I snapped back in defence of my best girlfriends, "It's just – you know how I've always been happy being me? - well Rose and Alice, more Rose than Alice, have this new idea that it would be fun to be in the '_in_ crowd' and ever since last night they seem to be about a million miles away, and by that I mean more Rose than Alice."

"What exactly happened last night?" he asked softly.

"Well they dissed _our_ crowd," I finished plainly, "so I went."

Jacob looked blank for a second then smiled kindly, "Do you remember that time when we were little, way back when Seth was in nappies do you remember he told you I had a big nose and you tried kick him?"

"Yeah," I grinned back, "luckily I missed cause my balance was so bad I fell as soon as I took one foot off the ground?"

"Then Leah..." he continued,

"All right, all right!" I interrupted, "what's your point?"

"You," Jake remarked, "are very protective of what's yours. You will always look after those who you consider your friends or, what you consider to be yours. Maybe you'd have fun being 'cool', just maybe you'd be good at it too. All those stuck up bitches need someone to look out for them too."

I sat there, now realising it was me who would have to apologize profoundly for my huge over reaction and beg to be debriefed on the 'get cool quick' plan. I felt like the criminal in a movie that was always just one step behind the rest of their team, the one that took the wrong corners and tripped over the ladders.

Jake winked at me and whispered go. "Thanks Jake," I said squeezing his hand and heading back for the truck. Once I was safely strapped in I called Rose on hands free.

"Bella?" she asked, "Now's really not a good time."

"Look Rose," I started, "I just wanted to say-"

"If you want to snivel to someone go snivel to that Jake of yours." she cut me off.

"Sorry 'bout last night." I said, then hung up before she could make me feel bad. I dialled Alice and waited for her to pick up.

"Bella!" Alice asked, with at least ten times more excitement and urgency than Rose, "Come quick!"

"What is it Alice?" I asked in auto-pilot, a pang of worry caught in the back of my throat.

"Come on Bella!" she squealed before the line went dead. I U-turned in the middle of the road and pulled off into her perfectly manicured drive.

"Alice?" I called, letting myself in with my spare key and running up the stairs. To my relief, or future horror, Alice was sitting wide eyed over a box on her bed.

"look!" she cried. Nervously I peered over the cardboard box, then I sighed,

"Alice you shouldn't have." I said bluntly appraising the boots I had willingly expressed my distaste for just 24 hours before, "Send them back to the store."

Alice rolled her eyes, "You know you want them. Besides, sale purchase I can't and they wouldn't fit Rose or I."

I grudgingly repacked the box to take home, "What's Rose so urgently doing right now anyway?"

Alice shrugged, "Didn't know she was; for all I know she could be holding some passionate affair. But tomorrow after school I'll have my new car – yellow, daddy already put the order through anyway which did make the decision a whole lot easier in the end – where was I? Oh yes, tomorrow after school we're going shopping for party outfits. Party's Friday!"

I gulped, I would not only have to mentally prepare for a party in just four days, but also cancel my bike session with Jacob on Friday, "Sure Alice," I said, remembering I was still making up for my massive over reaction, "Can I invite Jacob to the party, though?"

Alice deliberated for a second, seemingly weighing up the odds in her head, "Well I guess he is _quite_ hot and nobody in Forks really knows him so he can if he brings a couple of friends."

I smiled gratefully and make my excuses to go home. "OK then honey," Alice said giving me a quick hug, "I'll get daddy's chauffeur to pick us all up in the morning so we can hit the malls straight after school. Don't forget to wear the boots.... oh and that cute pink pinstripe shirt and the blue check jacket..." I listened to Alice's voice fade into the distance as I drove back across town to my house.

Alice and Rose lived in the posh side of town, along with all the supposedly cool people whereas I lived in a two-bedroom surrounded by wet forest with my dad. My mom ran away without trace the week after I was born. Charlie only refers to her as '_the whore_' but sometimes I like to think she still loves us, and she's looking out for me.

When I got in I heard Charlie slam down a mug in the kitchen, "BELLA!" he called.

"What?" I asked innocently, wondering if Mr Berty had called up about the 'late' incident this morning.

"What were you doing driving like that earlier, you nearly gave me a heart attack young lady!" he growled. From his breath I could tell he was sober. Thus yet he had never physically abused me, but after years of reading all the real-life-shockers in the magazines at the wall mart I always liked to be sure.

"What, on the way to Jacobs? I just-"

Charlie's eyebrows raised up his forehead considerably, "No, actually I meant nearer Alice's house but if you were driving dangerously round LaPlush I would like to know that as well."

"Sorry, I thought she was in trouble," I explained, then I tried to change the subject tactfully, "You know she's got a knew car? We're going for a ride tomorrow after school."

"No your not young lady, I'm not having you causing any more trouble on the roads. When were you planning on telling me about this party you girls are having anyway?"

_Who told him?_ Was my immediate thought but soon I came up with a coherent answer, "We only settled on a date today so I was going to tell you now and I_ have_ to go out tomorrow to get a dress."

His forehead crinkled and his cheeks reddened, "You are not going to be the hostess of one of those all under-age drink, drugs and sex workshops. You hear me? And even if you were going what's in that box? Seems like Alice has already spent plenty of money on you this week."

"Some shoes I left there actually." I lied, knowing Charlie was the only one who couldn't tell, "and Rose's parents will be there all the time."

"Sure," Charlie retorted, retreating back to the football game, "sure."

I sighed and went to bed; just wishing and hoping that things would work out.


	3. Chapter 3

_Not been well over the last couple of days but I wrote this at the weekend for all you guys!_

_Thank for the reviews... let's see if we can hit... 11? *big dreams :D*_

_remember, it may not seem like it, but these lovely ladies all belong to SM xxx PS – I made these sets of what the lovely ladies will be wearing at the party on Friday, find the link on my profile :D_

**Chapter 3**

I slammed my fist down on the alarm clock hard and grumbled as I gathered my wash stuff to have a shower. Tuesdays were the worst day of the week, and if today was any worse than yesterday I wasn't sure how I would get through all the ups and downs.

Alice was late to pick me up so I texted Jacob to see if he wanted to come on Friday. '_Sure thing Bells! will get Embry and Quill 2 tag along. Will try not 2 wreck Rose's place ;) x' _I laughed out loud at it before I spotted Mr Brandon's car come round the corner. I locked the door and ran down the front lawn to Alice and Rose.

"Hi guys," I greeted them merrily.

"Hey Bells, great boots!" Alice said, winking.

"Huh." Rose said, not bothering to look up from her phone.

"So," I said as we pulled away from my house, "What was going on yesterday, is there some stuff I should catch up on?"

"If you _can_." Rose snorted, still texting.

Alice ignored her, "Yeah, I guess. Sorry Bella if we seemed kinda harsh but we're basically trying to do what we see the crowd do at school. Rose gave out the party invites anonymously so we've just gotta play in cool – if you see what I mean – until Friday."

"Thanks Alice, it would have helped if I'd known that yesterday." I sighed, then added "Oh and Jacob can come."

Rose's head snapped up from her phone, "Who said that dog can come?"

"Rose," Alice warned quietly. I just sunk into my seat watching the wet day pass hoping Alice wouldn't spot that I bought the 'wrong' jacket. She did, "Bella, where is the blue jacket. This is _not_ flattering at all? Just look how mine is fitted? See? Well yours isn't," she concluded with a frown.

"Sorry Alice. Tomorrow," I promised.

Alice was probably going to protest again but we pulled up at school and had to get out quickly even if we were going to 'fashionably late'.

Catching my eye suddenly, across the parking lot was _them_. Emmett in his football kit climbed out the car fist, next out the silver Volvo was Jasper, earphones in and a crinkled smile; finally Edward came out. Tall, handsome and _hers._ Tanya ran up to him and threw her arms around him territorially. I turned my head quickly and linked arms with the others. Rose seemed reluctant but we all marched to home room together like old times. Like last week.

***

"Turn it down!" I screamed at Alice as we speed along the highway to Seattle. It was just me and Alice in her new porche because apparently three people in a two seater car was 'uncool' and Rose could buy an outfit online without 'the hassle of cash'.

"OK, OK," she laughed as she turned down the radio, "So I was going for a red theme on Friday and I'm pretty sure Rose will go for black so any ideas for what you wanna wear to the party?"

It was usually Alice who spent the day thinking about clothes but in truth I'd been secretly planning out my outfit in my head all day, I plucked up the courage to undoubtedly have it screwed, "Well actually I was thinking along the lines of a little white dress, just because it's-"

Alice cut me off excitedly, "Yeah! Seems like great minds think a like! I was thinking a nice pale grey or white dress with purple and grey accessories. That way it won't clash with me."

I rolled my eyes knowing that the white dress was all I was going to get and she would never approve of my nautical theme. Alice continued, "Originally I thought you could go a bit more sailor but it's really a bit last season," she paused, "well not really but it's just not 'rock n roll' enough – if you see what I mean?"

I nodded and grabbed my purse as she parked up at Seattle's biggest mall.

"So," she said as we walked in, "What do you think of Edward?"

I played it nonchalant, hoping she wasn't about to announce her undying love; I was a firm believer in 'finder's keepers loser's weeper', "What you mean the guy with the green eyes?"

"Yeah," she paused to turn into a shop, "You guys would make a really cute couple."

I paused, shell shocked, "Fist," I said, regaining sense, "are you just saying that cause you've got your eye on him, second we would, and third," I ended, with a touch of anger in my voice, "he's already got a girlfriend!"

"OK, OK cool it girl!" Alice soothed, with her finger to her lips, "If you mean Tanya that slut then forget it, as soon as he learns your name he'll be all over you. Secondly I have actually got my eye on that one with the cute blonde hair and yes, you would make a cute couple, especially if you were wearing this dress!" She pulled out a creamy white dress with a low back.

"I love it." I told her honestly, a red dress across the shop caught my eye and I ran across to the rail, "What about this?"

Alice's face lit up, "I couldn't have done it better!" she squealed, hugging the silky fabric.

We paid up and headed to the shoe store, "So, tell me... Jasper?" I asked pointedly.

"Edward?" Alice shot straight back, we laughed, careful not to crease our new dress, that of course, Alice had paid for. "No really," she said, "tell me honestly how long you've been crushing him."

"What? How do you know that at all?" I asked, then corrected myself, "I mean, why do you think that?"

"Let's face it, you've been dreaming about someone, and you did say you would make a cute couple." she said kindly, "Jasper and I would probably be a cute couple, but I don't know. I've definitely wanted him since the beginning of school!"

"Alice!" I scolded, shocked, "How on earth did you keep it to yourself that long? But since you told me I think I've liked Edward for even longer."

"Probably only seconds longer," she retorted, "I think Rose's got her eye on the other one. They would be cute too. I never really thought we had a chance though, but this time we might just have, and I like the feeling." she sighed and played with her hair.

I hopped neatly over the step into the shoe lover's heaven, "Tanya." I muttered sullenly.

"Whore," Alice mouthed back, running over to a pair of silver heels, "Oh my gosh! Pick these ones Bella!"

I shook my head, "They are about a metre high, I'm just gonna go for a nice pair of flats."

"Fine," she sighed, "it's your choice." and I knew she wasn't just talking about shoes.

"You're right," I agreed reluctantly, "they're great shoes."

_Hitting this little, harmless green button will make my day XD_

_V_


	4. Chapter 4

_I'm sorry it's not really any longer than the other chapters, I was going to try but I've been so busy with school it's not really been possible :( I hope you like anyway... I got the 11 reviews I wanted! YAY! R&R xxxx PS lyrics belong to Taylor and characters to SM :(_

**Chapter 4**

The next morning I applied more make-up than I would usually wear for anything, definitely not just school. I had decided that I would do whatever it takes, not to be cool, but to keep my best friends.

Rose picked up Alice and I but she stared harshly out the windscreen all the way to school and didn't talk at all. Rather than being insulted about our conversation Alice and I kept quiet and she plugged her new ipod play-list into the car speakers.

"Had fun shopping?" Rose finally asked as we got out the car, "I've ordered the cutest black outfit so I'm afraid if you've picked black you'll have to take it back to the store."

Alice mouthed "_I was so right"_ at me before turning to Rose and saying, "Really, I would have thought you'd go for red, I guess I'll have to take my outfit back." I stood there, momentarily stunned, _Alice did buy red though didn't she?_

"Aw honey," Rose cooed apologetically, "thanks, do you have a back up?"

"Yeah, I'll do red instead." Alice answered, putting on a pretty good 'hurt' act.

"I'm sure you'll look just _divine,_" Rose reassured her, "What you going for Bella?"

"White."

"Innocent," she laughed, "figures."

I slammed my locker shut, "Stiff door," I lied transparently.

The morning passed slowly; lunchtime came and Rose was clutching her gym bag. My expression probably asked the question that was on Alice and my own mind.

"Cheer try outs," Rose said simply, "you girls coming?"

"I dunno," Alice replied doubtfully, "Not every body's on the cheer squad. I mean, Emmett's girlfriend Jessica wasn't."

"Ex-girlfriend," Rose inserted quickly, "What about you Bella, do you want to try out?"

"Sorry Rose," I answered honestly, "I'd probably just trip over my own feet. Mind out though, you're easily good enough to get captain even. _Try not to knock Tanya off the spot_." I added sarcastically.

"Sounds like someone's a little jealous!" Rose mocked before turning to leave. It was weird, because it wasn't even mocking in a nasty way, Rose had actually just held the first nice conversation with me in days. It lasted seconds but nice nonetheless.

"Wow," Alice whispered, "someone's got a bad case of PMS, she wasn't like this earlier!." We linked up and ate lunch on the wet grass practising for our Spanish oral and chucking gummy bears at each other. A guy from the jock table walked over slowly,

"Hey," he said snottily, "I'm Mike. You girls new to the school?" I felt like getting up and hitting him, we were in the same English class for the second year running.

Alice nudged me gently, "Not too new," she said, "We know our way around." I turned the corner of my mouth up dryly, wondering if this guy was stupid enough to fall for it. He probably was actually.

He smiled pervertedly, "So I'll see you ladies at the party up Rugby Drive on Friday... and your fit blonde friend?"

Alice nodded, her arms tensing when he referred to Rose as the 'fit blonde' one. Once he walked away I tried to keep the sheer annoyance at bay, "Don't worry, I bet you're the fit dark haired one."

She didn't reply at once, her eyes stayed narrowed of Mike's retreating figure. Once he resumed showing off to his friends, Alice turned and grinned, "No I bet you're the fit dark haired one, I bet I'm just the fittest one!" I biffed her over the head before the warning bell went and we trudged back to the home room.

"Guys!" Rose called from the back row, "Oh my gosh! You'll never guess what!"

"What?" I asked as I flopped down on the empty chair next to her.

"Well, team list isn't up till school's over but coach said I've got a pretty darn good chance! And I'm the only one she talked to, not even Tanya."

"Well done Rose!" Alice said giving her a lopsided hug as not to start any lesbian rumours.

"I'm sure you'll get on the squad Rose!" I said, feeling truly happy for her, "but you know, Tanya might just be sure already."

Rose's face dropped just a fraction of an inch and she said, "Glad to see you've got so much trust in me." the bell went before I could apologize. But she seamed fine again that afternoon, like Alice said, probably just serious PMS.

***

The rest of the day I was still careful not to smudge my make-up or rumple my shirt so by the time school ended I was thankful. Alice was shopping for Friday, now only a day away and Rose had some excuse about a doctor's appointment so I was happy just to walk home in the rain.

At first I kept my stripy umbrella positioned neatly on my shoulder to keep my hair perfect but once the school was far enough away, I let it down and jumped into every puddle I pasted. "_She wears short skirts – I wear t-shirts! She's cheer captain and I'm on the bleachers.. dreaming about the day when you'll wake up and find that what you're looking for, has been here the whole time.._." I screamed over the wind and through the rain. My hair was plastered to my head and my make up was streaked down my face but I didn't really care. Alice would kill me if I didn't get these jeans cleaned too, but all I cared was jumping in the biggest puddle I had ever seen about ten feet up the road, "_Cause I'm the one..._"

I jumped off the pavement and into the knee deep puddle when suddenly there was a loud screech and a flash of silver. I slipped, even though the car didn't hit me, my lack of co-ordination pulled me over anyway.

"Oh My Gosh!" Said a worried, but still inhumanly velvety voice running towards me, "Are you OK?"

I opened my eyes slowly and looked up at _him_. It was Edward, and suddenly he realised who I was, Bella. _Bells_, _Izzy-Whizzy_, "_my best girl Ding-dong_" and the only one he shared his crayons with in Kindergarten. As quickly as the realisation had flashed in his eyes it disappeared, "Are you OK?" he said numbly, "Did I hit you?"

"No, I'm OK I think." I smiled.

He smiled, warming just a tiny bit, "Nice singing by the way."

"Oh..." I flushed, but he grinned again, I wondered what happened, why I just wasn't cool enough for him once we started school, "Yeah, um... I'm practising." Oh God Bella. Why did you have to say that?

"You in the show?" he asked with interest, "You were pretty good actually."

"No," I mumbled, flushing deeper, "practising for the shower more likely." I shut my eyes, wishing I was home, safe in she shower instead of sitting on the wet kerb side.

He laughed, "Well I'll probably see you Friday then." I was too gob-smacked to reply coherently. He got back in his car and with a nod, drove back in the opposite direction, covering me with the puddle as he went.

I walked back in a daze towards my house, it wasn't far now but suddenly I could feel the weight of the water in my shoes and the stiffness of my jeans. Did he mean that? I would see him at the party, that is if he turned up once people realised who the hosts were. Would I see him? Was he just saying that? Did he regret ditching me for all the cool girls at school?

It was just as well Charlie was out because I slumped down on the sofa and didn't bother picking myself up till well gone three. First I checked my phone, one message from Alice telling me what to wear, then another, annoyed I hadn't replied, a text from Rose telling me all about her new position as a cheerleader and one from an unknown number, it said '_hope__ you got home OK. I got ur no of ur friend... whats she called? Lily, Daisy... Rose?_'. I replied _'OK :D' _without breathing, hoping I didn't wake him up, then I dealt with Alice and finally texted Rose, _'Congrats... and y the hell does Edward have ur number?!?' _there was no reply from any of them so I went to bed, as usual, just hoping for the best.


	5. Chapter 5

Sorry it's been so long since I updated but I've been so busy but I'm gonna try and update more over the next few weeks! The start of this chapter is a little lousy but helpfully it gets better a couple of paragraphs in. All characters are Sms!!!! LY thanks for reviews!!! xxx

**Chapter 5**

It's the times that are most special and treasured in your heart that mean the least at the time. I dreamed about those crayons, those stupid coloured Kindergarten crayons, they knew nothing of my world, nothing of my life. _Red and yellow and pink and blue, orange and purple and green, _he chanted slowly, _I can sing a rainbow, a rainbow, not you._

I woke up in a cold sweat, my phone buzzed again, telling me it was time to get up, and I had another text. A whole day had passed since Edward saw me in the rain, a full day since he'd got my number off Rose and probably at least ten minutes since he'd last texted me.

I didn't get much sleep after crashing on the couch on Wednesday night, and when I woke up in the morning I was still pretty tired so I called Alice for a lift. When I got in the car Rose wasn't there yet, apparently we should pick her up a few curbs away from her house, Alice hadn't asked why but she secretly though Rose might have gained a few pounds, and therefore was burning. When we eventually met Rose I asked her about Edward knowing her number, still not wanting to completely reveal the reason of my asking. She shrugged too quickly, and in the inevitable way, it was unbelievable. I resorted to sending Edward, a hopefully not too desperate text at the end of school: _Rose is blank about ur number, u sure u didn't get it some other way? :s_. As usual my luck followed and an angry text came back, _get out bitch. He is mine. I will deal with u 2morrow. LYL Tanya xo._

As freaked as I was at the time, as much as I couldn't move from my spot for hours and as much as the only phrase going through my mind at the time was _"Uh-oh"_, like all bad times, it passed. And another text arrived before seven _Sorry about that Bella, I dont know whats got in2 her latley, sorry I missed u yesterday, was going 2 check if you were alright bt things got in the way. _… and things followed, I texted him, following all the rules, a profound exception of his apology, and then when he texted back promising to make it up, profoundly refusing, and when he insists, accepting with subtle enthusiasm. Somehow, the single sentance conversation didn't end there though, we sent each other, these emotionless little messages every five minutes from dusk till dawn, not getting much sleep in-between. Finally at ten to seven he announced he needed to get into his PJs so his mom could come and bring him some breakfast. I laughed and snapped my phone shut. He never said "see you later" but never told me good bye.

….. And just like that, 24 hours of my life had passed, to an outsider it probably didn't look like I'd achieved much, maybe spent at least $30 dollars credit texting, or that I now knew Edwards top 10 songs backward and the exact ingredients and measures to his favourite desert. But to me, I'd achieved everything. I didn't have a lot of enthusiasm for layering myself with make-up or strapping myself into another pair of five-inch heels, because to me, I was already on the home straight, he was within my sights again, but I knew that in the real world, that wasn't how it worked, and if I wanted him, Alice was right, I had to work.

I heard Alice's noisy engine pull up outside my house but instead of waiting in the car I heard her pixie steps running up the gravel and a tap and her light tap at the door. She must have been excited about something.

"I have big news!" she announced as I cautiously pulled the door shut behind me.

"Um.... Elvis isn't dead?" I asked.

She rolled her eyes at me and pulled me towards the car (and for a little lady she is really very strong), "Emmett," she paused, "have you had no sleep tonight?"

I shrugged and motioned for her to carry on, "Emmett?"

She eyed me sceptically for a second before continuing, "You better tell me what you were up all night doing later young lady... anyway, back to the big news, Jemmett, are no longer."

I didn't answer – didn't Rose tell us yesterday this when I pointed out that Jess had never been on the cheer squad but she'd had the one of the Cullens.

"Hello, Bells, Jessica and Emmett have split up! Isn't this great, Rose will be ecstatic! Only problem is, apparently they only broke up because Emmett was cheating on Jess, and it definitely wasn't someone from down LaPlush, cause, well you know, and so the somebody must have known they were being cheated with... and Bella? Are you even listening to me?"

"Huh? Yeah, big news, Rose will love it. I bought my stuff for the party, I can come straight to yours tonight can't I?" I asked, changing the subject.

"Sure honey, we can both stay over at hers because I have a feeling it will be a long night, can you believe people will actually turn up. I mean what Mike said yesterday was amazing – I mean Bella – Hello! We exist!"

"Amazingly uncool," I repeated quietly.

Alice glanced at me in the mirror, "Huh, I guess you really didn't get much sleep at all. You not going to tell me? Not going to tell your best friend in the whole word what you were doing all night?"

I shook my head and started to get out the car when I saw Edward, turn around and start to come this way. "Oh," Alice said, "so that's what you were _doing_."

"Alice!" I squealed back, preying he hadn't heard.

"Hi Edward," I said cooly, or as cooly as I could manage when my breakfast was currently hurling its self around around my stomach.

"Hey Bella." He smiled, cooler than a cucumber, "Can't stick about," he glanced over his shoulder at a Tanya who almost seemed to be sprinting our way, "but I'll see you at the party tonight, Tanya's visiting family..." he trailed off, the turned to the girl in question, "Hey babe, just swapping some notes..." as the two intertwined figures trailed into the distance I distinctly saw Tanya's middle finger.

Suddenly my good mood vanished and I remembered my dream, I wasn't good enough for him. _Face it Bella, he _had_ the rainbow, you can't even sing it._

I turned sharply on my heels, "I need to go talk to Rose, I'll catch you in a minute." I said to Alice before a hot tear could roll down my cheek.

Across the lot I saw Rose's flash red convertible cruising around looking for a space, by some magic I didn't trip as I ran across the lot in my dagger heels. I climbed into the passenger seat, "What is going on?" I said, barley able to stop myself from screaming.

"Well babe," she said, touching up her lippy whilst doing a complicated driving manoeuvre into the last parking space, "as far as I know you just talked to one of the hottest guys in school, stood up Alice and graced me with your angelic presence. You tell me what's going on."

I collected my thoughts for a second and decided grudgingly not to take out my anger on Rose, after all, she was just as much my best friend as Alice, supposedly, "Yeah, that is what just happened, sorry but please explain to me why you've had three doctors appointments in the past week, Edward has your number and you haven't even shed a tear when you didn't get out of bed for a week when Emmett got his last girlfriend. And please don't tell me you've moved on."

Rose laughed and picked up her bag from the back seat, "Yes Bells, I have moved on, I've moved on to reality."

"What? But I thought you said he was definitely the one, when you brushed his arm in the corridor last month, and you said you felt sparks...?"

"Yes! That's exactly my point! That wasn't real! That was fantasy, where will touching his arm every month get you? Will that get you a house and three kids? No I don't think so. I was living off the fantasy, now I'm living in the real world." she announced.

"You've, got someone new." I stared.

"No," she laughed getting out the car, "I've moved onto the real thing."

I gaped a little.

"Emmett, the one over there, big six-pack, really yummy, cute dimples...."

I snapped my moth shut a wiped under my eye, "Alice doesn't know." I said, half asking half stating.

"Oh of course, please don't though, it will make it a lot easier, just play it cool Bells." Rose grinned at me with a wink. As hard as it was to say no to her, I wasn't sure how much playing cool I was going to be able to do today. "Oh and Edward doesn't have my number, he probably just took it off my phone the other night."


	6. Chapter 6

As a special present to you all I'm updating, not only a day after I last did, but also the longest chapter yet. Please review, feedback is the best thing I could ever ask for :D and if you review again soon I'll update even sooner!! xx PS – links to party outfits are on my profile, they don't work on the stories :]

**Chapter 6**

Memories of the previous night were foggy, like trying to see through sea water. I had the feeling that something bad had happened last night, but when I tried to think of it my head hurt so much so I just gave up. I tried listening to Alice and Rose talk in whispers across her king-sized bed but the noise of their hushed voices was so deafening I resorted to lulling in my pain. All of me was in agony, bits of me I didn't even know existed were screaming out in pain. As tempting as it was to sit up and find out what it was that happened, something was telling me I should probably figure it out for myself before I face Alice and Rose.

***

_Like planned Alice and I drove back to her house in her shiny yellow porche and picked up our stuff, then we drove back over to Rose's place which had been done over into a shimmering party pad, all surfaces covered in bottles, speakers tucked into every corner and the lights dimmed to a soft, alluring glow._

"_Nice one Rose," Alice complimented, "have your parents left yet?"_

_I stopped a second, hadn't I already broken two of my promises to Charlie: no drinking, and Rose's parents would be handy at all times? I hesitated._

"_Yeah, well they could hardly not go, and they knew that, and I knew they knew that so they've gone to visit Gramps." Rose gushed. She was wrapped up in a fluffy cotton towel with her hair wet round her shoulders, "you gonna come and get ready or what?"_

_We trailed up to her room, the most enormous designer pastel space in the whole of Forks. After showering in her en suit we did each other's hair and make-up, just like old times. It was nice, even Rose admitted it. Nine o'clock came though, and people that I recognised from High School, and some I didn't started to float in,most brining more bottles or suspicious, small packages._

***

I thought about it carefully for a while, but I still had this feeling this wasn't the cause of the extra sharp pains that were exploding like fireworks in the back of my brain. I could remember the next half an hour or so fairly clearly, I could remember dancing around and nibbling sorbets that cost twice my dad's weekly food budget, I could even remember perching on the edge of the pool and assessing outfits with Alice. Then he arrived, Edward arrived.

***

_First I saw Emmett, it was impossible to miss his huge muscled frame getting out the car. I'd done a good job off keeping Rose's little secret away from Alice all day and keeping with the game he high-fived some football mates and headed into the house, where Rose didn't follow slyly for at least another 30 seconds. Next Jasper got out, and just a tiny bit less subtle than Rose, Alice leapt forward to give him a _warm _and certainly enthusiastic greeting. Leaving me standing there as Edward got out the car. _

_It took a few seconds for my brain to put together any coherent words of greeting so I turned swiftly on my heels and walked back towards the party. His step was quicker than mine though and he over took me quickly, his velvet voice passing me in a cool breeze, "I'll catch up with _you_ later miss-hard-to-get."_

_***_

I thought about it a little more but I was certain that it hadn't been my uncalled for reaction to Edward that got me into such a mess last night, in fact I was fairly certain that hadn't been the last I saw of Edward last night. Thinking about it, it was the next guests that caused the problems. The rules of holding a party state not to invite guests that, quite simply hate each other, let alone enemies.

***

_Suddenly, like a hurricane, the realisation of what I'd done hit me, I'd invited the guest of honour's sworn enemy. Oops._

"_Hi Jake," I said evenly._

"_Bells!" He called, angling for a hug._

_I stood numbly, wondering quite what to do, "Um Jake, not a good time, maybe you should just go."_

"_Not so easy tiger!" he laughed, "now we've driven all this way me and the boys want to have some fun."_

_With Quil and Emby on his flanks he marched in, walking straight into the exact people I should have kept him away from._

"_Cullen" he greeted._

"_I didn't know you invited any dogs to the party," Edward chuckled, "no disrespect Bella, but the fact you invited _puppies _really does take the biscuit."_

_I didn't have an answer, although I wasn't sure if Jake's came by luck or to my later misfortune, "Bella?" he asked me, "you haven't let anybody call you that since first grade."_

_And Jake was right, and the reason was standing a punch throw away from him, in the form of my only love, Edward._

_***_

I could remember that there wasn't any fighting after that particular renovation, my blush was still crystal clear to me, and the sounds of both sets of footsteps retreating, designer shoes and Quiluette flats.

The splitting headache was almost certainly from the glass after glass of smooth, burning vodka punch I downed after that, enjoying the strong taste in my mouth and the freedom in my head. Maybe the ninth glass caused more trouble than the rest.

***

_Seven, eights, nine. Nine glasses of almost pure alcohol, not to mention countless of champagne since we'd arrived here after school. Suddenly I could hear my phone vibrating in my purse. I whipped it out and answered as best as I could._

"_Hewo Charwie," I said, shocked at just how drunk I sounded._

_There was silence at the other end of the line then, "Isabella... have you been drinking?"_

"_Noaw," I started, then thankful my guardian angle in disguise, Alice came along at that precise moments._

"_Hello Mr Swan. No Bells hasn't been drinking, it was just a game of truth or dare. No Mr Swan, you don't need to come down here, it's all under control. Sorry Rose's dad went to get more candy. No her mother can't come to the phone right now she's dealing with an emergency. No! Don't worry, nothing like that; a girl emergency...." Alice winked at me, "Yes alright Mr Sw- Charlie, I'll see you tomorrow. Goodnight."_

_I stared at her, wondering how she could do that, "Good god Bells, you weren't actually supposed to get _drunk, _she sighed, "just go upstairs – now! Just whatever you do please don't cause any more trouble." she added._

_I glanced at the mess the stair case was in, "What about Edward?" I slurred in a desperate attempt do – something I wasn't quite sure what yet._

"_You can't make any more of a fool of your self, did you see-" she hesitated, wondering exactly how much I'd had to drink, "fine, just catch his eye, try and look alluring and hard-to-get then sneak away. Go to bed. It will feel better in the morning."_

_Normally I wouldn't have done what Alice said but the room was starting to spin so I complied, or at least I think I did._

_***_

My head felt like it was having bricks thrown over it as reality got closer and closer and Rose and Alice's voices got closer and closer but I knew I would have to be armed with everything I knew about last night before I could face them. Alice hadn't been right, nothing felt any better right now. It was a shame I didn't know what happened between Jake and the Cullens but I did know that after being incredibly sick over Rose's parents suit the real trouble began.

***

_I sat with my back flat on the bedroom wall and with my eyes shut like I was trying to undo everything that had happened over the past week, which I was trying to do._

"_I didn't know you smoked," was the first thing that came into my head to say as he sat down next to me._

"_I didn't know you drank," he retorted._

"_I don't" I said lamely._

"_Well neither do I," he paused, "smoke I mean." Edward took another swig of his vodka._

_I eyed the cigarette in his hand sceptically, "really?"_

"_Truly," he promised, then gushed, "sorry, that was in polite of me, I should have offered it around, want some?" he passed me the roll of paper, nudging me as I hesitated. I held me breath, weighing the odds in my head, eventually I decided the outcome couldn't get much worse after my intake (and outputting) of so much alcohol._

_Before I knew it, the roll of paper hadn't been the only thing to have touched my lips, and I was sure that it wasn't a regular cigarette too, I'd smelt plenty of brands off Charlie's overcoat, and this wasn't one. But the most magical bit of the evening was the most natural as he bent in to kiss me, I knew Rose was letting off fireworks somewhere outside but the ones I was feeling right there was ten times better._

***

I sighed, almost audibly at the memory, I was sure I hadn't _done_ anything else with him , after all, how ever drunk you got I was sure you would always remember your first time. I fell asleep in his arms, in the corridor, for all to see I was his.

***

_A pair of golden heels suddenly appeared approximately two inches from my face, "Hello Bella," said a haughty voice, "Hello there honey."_

_Edward sat up, "oh, Tanya."_

_I didn't know what I expected next, after what happened with Rose and Emmett I sort of hoped that Edward would end it with Tanya right there and then; but there's a fine line between dreams and reality._

"_Tanya." I acknowledged, remembering I was the only one there who hadn't spoken yet._

"_Seems like the family do wasn't compulsory in the end," she giggled, "come on then Eddie." Like a lost puppy, he got up and followed. She smirked at me and I could have got up to hit her right then, and I did._

_I blacked out to the sound of a scream._


	7. Chapter 7

_Nobody is reviewing! You should be ashamed of yourselves because I know people are READING. I want more reviews please! This chapter is dedicated to those who R&R, and if you haven't so far, please do, I know your names! All characters belong to Stephanie Meyer – at the moment. xo_

**Chapter 7**

I groaned and turned over slowly, "Bella," Alice said hearing me, "Ugh, you're a real mess."

I blinked.

Rose rolled her eyes at me, "please tell me you know what happened."

I shrugged, "I think I've got it pretty much clocked until umm... Tanya arrived?"

Rose smiled pitifully and handed me some aspirins, "You're gonna need these babe."

"So what happened after that?" I asked, gulping three down.

"Well before we do any explaining I think you should tell us why you were wrapped around Edward anyway." Rose replied, raising her eyebrows.

"He sort of followed me I guess." I said quietly.

"He what!?" Rose shouted back.

"He followed me upstairs. I only did what you told me to." I whined, shovelling another few aspirins down.

"Yes but obviously you didn't sneak away carefully enough. The clue was in the word sneak! You only had to go quietly enough so he couldn't follow you, it wasn't like you needed any more trouble."

"Jacob..." I trailed off, aiming for more information.

"I wasn't even thinking of that," Alice replied.

I let out a small scream falling forward on the bed. Alice shoved me away again, "Ew, and stink and everything, you need a shower! We'll talk on the way to drop your stuff home. And you can tell Charlie we're going shopping for Angela's party next weekend."

"Ew, Angela? We didn't even invite her!" I was shocked at myself as soon as the words came out my mouth. Angela Webber was a respectable girl, quite booksy but nice, and she even sat next to me when Alice and Rose got the flu.

Neither Alice nor Rose thought anything of my comment and instead helped me up, as I was turning out the room a thought struck me, "Um Rose, do we need to clean up your parent's room, or something."

"Don't even mention it, what you did was completely gross and out of order, but we got somebody to clean it up anyway."

I wondered what exactly Rose thought I had done (although whatever they thought had happened might well have happened because my memories of last night were sketchy to say the least). It took me at least ten minutes to get down stairs without murdering my poor head and once I got down I saw that Rose and Alice must have taken the back stairs because they were already sitting in the kitchen eating musili. Just the thought of food nearly made me turn around and be sick again but I held it out and turned the coffee machine on.

"So," I said, giving up on subtlety completely, "What the hell happened last night?"

"Well if you mean once Tanya arrived and your failure to attack her you fell down the stairs and we had to call Carlisle." Rose said in between mouthfuls.

"What?" I screamed suddenly, wishing I hadn't when my headache increased noticeably, "Isn't that the Cullen's dad?"

"Yes," she said simply.

"Why? What? I mean how?" I rushed, "I didn't do anything to her – I swear I didn't!"

"No you idiot!" Alice said with shock, "Don't you remember anything?"

I shook my head and looked down in shame. As I did, some black and red marks on my body caught my eyes – some wasn't even the right word, I was covered in black bruises and brown scars. "What happened?" I whispered.

They put their arms around me, "You really don't remember much do you?" Alice said, in the same tone as me, "you looked really angry when you got up, like you were going to hit Tanya, but she stuck her leg out – the bitch – because let's face it, it was so obvious you were drunk. You took it hard though, you fell down about ten stairs before going completely over the banisters. Carlisle was the only doctor we could call out, he promised not to tell Charlie, if we behave."

Rose chewed the end of her spoon thoughtfully for a second, "I didn't see the guys – I mean Em, Jasper and Edward – after that, they seemed to disappear after that."

"Oh yeah!" Alice squealed, "The other big news... Rose and Emmett are a thing!"

I tried to look surprised but my performance skills weren't helped by the hangover from hell.

"Alice!" Rose laughed, "I saw you and Jasper getting cosy too."

Alice winked, "getting cosy doesn't make you a couple, just ask Bella..."

I stiffened. Noticing Rose instructed me to go and take a shower so we could head off.

I let the burning hot water cleanse me, I still knew I was missing some crucial details of last night's party but when I stepped out into a fluffy cotton towel, probably organic and fair trade knowing Mrs Hale, I had little enthusiasm left to find out exactly what they were at that precise moment. I saw that Alice had left a neatly folded pile of clothes for me,and despite the baby pink shade of the jumper and the brand-new crisp of the jeans I was still eternally grateful that they were something different from the sickly smelling, ripped dress that had looked so good before last night.

I wrapped my hair in the towel and dressed quickly and went to find the others downstairs. Now that I was looking around properly I could see that the Hale staff had done a very good job of clearing up, it looked and smelt exactly like it had done before the party.

Alice clocked my towel covered hair when I turned into the lounge where she and Rose were watching the shopping channel idly, "Why aren't you wearing any make-up yet?" she asked, like it was some sort of crime.

"I don't know-" she didn't let me finish my sentence, which was actually a half decent excuse about the where-abouts of my make-up bag but instead Alice pounced on me which her own make-up supplies.

"Rose can you fetch a hair dryer? Maybe some ceramics too?" Alice called over her shoulder.

Rose nodded and shouted to nowhere in particular, "Victoria will you fetch us some hair things?" and within a few minuets a red-haired house maid appeared at the door with a hair-dryer and some styling mouse.

Rose got up and collected them but didn't look satisfied, "didn't I say hair things Victoria? Two items do hardly class as a plural of things! Alice wants ceramics, now you go get some or you'll be buying some more out your own wages!" Rose snapped at the poor girl.

As the maid retreated I felt the her eyes bore into my back.

After Alice had a sufficient game of "Barbie Bella" I let her put the final touches on her own outfit and went to find the maid, Victoria. I climbed up all the stair cases of the huge house, glad that some of the medicines were starting to numb my pain from the night before. I pushed the attic door open, not surprised that even this part of Rose's house was bright and airy.

"Victoria?" I called quietly, not wanting the others to hear me.

"What?" came a sharp voice from the close door besides me, "if you're Miss Hale's stupid stuck-up friend coming to apologise don't bother, I know you don't mean it."

"But I do," I said, choosing my words carefully, "I just wanted to make sure you're OK. I know Rose can be a bit sharp sometimes but that's just her nature."

The door opened a crack, "You don't know anything about me or this house, I've lived here almost all my life and I don't need you intruding it."

"What? But me and Rose, I mean we're life-long friends too, I don't remember you?" I asked.

The door opened another few inches, "Well you wouldn't would you? I was just the servant girl, you let me play your games but only so I could _serve_ the tea-parties or mind the babies when you went to bake cookies with your mums."

I took that as a low blow, "Well looks like you don't know much about me either, because my mum left when I was only a baby."

"Oh," Victoria said, letting her guard down for just a split second. Before I could read the emotions in her dark eyes she snapped, "Well it was just me and my dad Laurent here, then he died last year and what fun for the Hales, I couldn't get another gig being under-age and now they can treat me however they like and-"

"Bella! It's time to go!" Rose shouted from the drive.

"Good bye," Victoria said icily, then she slammed the door for show and I could hear her flop onto a bed through the dark wood.

I was intrigued by her, in a weird, dark way. I didn't listen to Alice and Rose talk on the way back to my house, I racked by brain for any memories with the fiery haired Victoria in but couldn't find a single one.

"Just go in quickly, dump your stuff, say hi to Charlie and leave before he can suspect anything OK?" Alice asked as we pulled up.

"Yeah fine, I'll be back before you know it." I said.

"Missing you already," joked Rose.

"Hey Dad!" I called, aiming for the light and breezy sound, I turned into the kitchen for my polished Oscar-deserving good girl routine. It was when I put down my bag and looked around the room I saw her.

"Hi honey." my mother said.

I couldn't face this, not right now, so I swiftly turned straight back around. I could hear my 'parents' calling after me as I climbed back into Alice's car but I blanked them.

"Drive," I said.


	8. Chapter 8

**Whoot whoot! Longest chapter I've ever written for anything :) Happy Christmas, I have lots of school work at the moment and I've started the squeal to my first Story Cullens Behaving Badly (:D read it) but I will still try and update this as much as possible because I'm getting into the plot now and I feel like I'm heading towards the ending (I have it all mapped out for you x]) anyway, I'll stop rambling now, I know lots of people don't read A/Ns – I do but that's not the point ;) Thanks for the great reviews, xo**

**Chapter 8**

"Your Dad not in?" Rose asked as we drove back through Forks, "I would have thought he'd be checking up on you after last night."

"Yeah," I lied awkwardly, "well no, actually he just said I should get going if we were going to... beat the traffic to Seattle."

Alice raised her eyebrows at me, "Did you even say hi to him? He's going to be worried you know."

I shook my head, "fine, I did say hi, but then I left."

Alice shrugged and I knew what it meant, so when I got into trouble later I couldn't blame her.

***

It was just getting dark when we whizzed back down the highway and into dreary little Forks, my head hurt like hell, but admit ably we had got some nice buys in the sale and Rose filled me in on another six various party invites we had revived last night and Alice had made sure I had six new dresses plus spares.

It was then it dawned on me again what, or who, would most likely still be waiting for me when I got home and I stiffened.

"You know Alice, I think Charlie said he'd be out tonight so I could stay at yours," I hinted as we drove towards the edge of the woods and Charlie's dreary little house.

"What's wrong babe?" Rose asked over the buzzing radio.

"Nothing," I shrugged.

"Come on, it can't just be nothing, you're all hot and tense." Alice pointed out the obvious.

I decided that they wouldn't let me off unless I let them in on the secret promptly, "Well, this morning, Charlie was in, and so was... my mom."

The gasped, Rose put her arm round me and Alice took one hand off the wheel to squeeze my hand, "Oh Bells, you should have stayed, it could have been bad." I crossed my eyes at her, the world recognised action for i_t's not helping_, "or it could be a good thing." she added hopefully.

Rose motioned for her to shut up, "Alice is right, sort of, I mean what's the worst it could be? She might just want to meet you, you're all grown up now." she winked and I biffed her round the head.

"Not that grown up," I moaned but Rose cut me off again.

"And what if it's not that? What if she just wanted to scrounge money? Maybe Charlie was about to kick her out anyway, you shouldn't hide from problems you don't even know exist!"

"You couldn't come round tonight anyway honey, my grandparents are coming round and they want to take us to dinner," Alice said as she stopped the car just off the drive.

I climbed out and waved back at the best friends in the whole world. I took two steps forward and one step backwards as I walked to wards the house; when I was little I had done this, hoping that when I got to the house my momma would be inside, cooking beans on toast and ready to hear about my day at school. Today I was wishing the opposite.

I opened the door and hesitated, wondering weather to call and announce my home-coming. I decided best not to and crept round to the stairs with to put my things away upstairs.

"Isabella? Is that you?" Called a voice, more nervous than angry.

I didn't reply, why was she still here anyway?

"Bella? Speak to your mom," Charlie called leading her into the hall, "what was that little stunt earlier anyway?"

"Sorry," I started to mutter, "I think it was like Angela, or someone or something..." I trailed, the aspirins were wearing off and the hangover hadn't quite finished haunting me.

"We need to have a talk Bella," Charlie said slowly, "the three of us, maybe you could put your stuff upstairs and come back down?" I nodded, "an apology would be nice too."

I shrugged my shoulders and climbed the stairs, I took the opportunity for numbing my headache and grabbing a jumper as the night grew darker.

Downstairs again as I slunk into the kitchen I decided to get the first word in, "What are you doing here anyway_ Rene_?"

Mom's head jerked up at my use of her name, "Honey, I'm your _mom_, I'm allowed to come say hi once in a while to my baby."

"Yeah, and you probably would have been welcome for just about the last sixteen years of my life. I'm over you." I snapped, careful not to raise my voice with Charlie considering my every word from across the table.

"That's no way to speak to your mother," he said solemnly, "It's been sixteen years, like you said, have a chat."

"I hear you've been out to a party? With your girls? Or a boy maybe?" she asked me, her voice thick with false enthusiasm.

"Meh," I grunted, "Would it be wrong of me to ask what you've been doing for the last sixteen years, it certainly _hasn't _been a party 'round here."

She fidgeted nervously, "Well honey, I don't know, your dad didn't tell me anything I'd been up to? I don't really like talking about it."

I clocked on the facts straight away: firstly Charlie had always told me my mom, Rene, had run away about a year after I was born, and hadn't heard from her since, minus a couple of pleas for money; and secondly, something bad, or bad enough for my mother not to want to talk about it had happened.

"Bella after your mom left us she was in an abusive relationship, with a man called Laurent," Charlie paused by my face, I couldn't quite recall where I'd last heard the name but I knew... "But Bella, it's OK, she got out didn't she? It was a rocky road but-"

Rene cut him off, "I found a man called Phill, and you wouldn't believe what a long time I was with him honey, I was ever so good, but he's gone now. And I know who my babies are."

I shook my head insistently then rose from the table, "Good night. And please don't call me honey."

"Good night hon-Bella." she called after me.

"Bella, be nice," Charlie called.

"Night _Dad_," I echoed sweetly.

He harrumphed and I heard the kitchen voice shut and low whispers but I wasn't that bothered by what they were saying. I couldn't care less what my mother thought about me, she was only genetics after all, and I loved Charlie so much, but it wasn't like I had to live here for much longer anyway.

I climbed into bed and turned on my phone, letting it load up slowly and receive the unaccountable number of texts that were due, probably from worried parents last night, worried friends, and now friends worried about the parents. I was so tempted to leave them for the next morning but I knew they wouldn't get any better so I opened the first of over fifty.

_'Your at a party tonight? So I have to cook for myself?' a_nd '_Well you're not back so I'm getting pizza, call if you want any.' a_nd finally '_I remember now, party with the girls, have fun, dad.' _ were three of the least frantic messages from Charlie. I flicked through a few from people at school, mainly new numbers I didn't recognise asking me if I would be at the party tonight, this was before they saw the hosts I guess, a few more texts congratulating a great party, and then later on from the night was several texts saying they hope I was OK, and a few more mocking, like the one from him, '_ouch ur head is gonna hurt in the morning, call me, e x'_, I didn't call him straight away but read it a few more times. Taking in the kiss at the bottom.

I set my phone down and methodically unpacked my shopping, brushed my hair and teeth and pulled on some pyjamas before picking up my phone again, and opening my messages to see if it hadn't been my imagination placing the X at the bottom of Edward's text. When I had persuaded myself it was definitely there I flicked through the rest of my messaged in the vague hope they would give me any more vital clues on last night so I wouldn't make even more of a fool calling him. There was one from Jacob saying '_Cullen sure throws a neat punch, dont worry will sort him out. Jake x' _in annoyance I texted him back telling him to put ice on it if hurt that much and sent another to Alice and Rose saying I hadn't read all their texts yet but it was only a visit from my mom, not the end of the world and three texts a minute were not required (although we were still on for the movies tomorrow). By the time I had dealt with the rest I was too tired to call and instead texted Edward a careful message, '_aspirin saves lives, nice seeing u last night. Bella xx' _I wondered if putting two kisses seemed keen but then one might seem like I was only putting it because he did... I wished I could call Alice without getting a third degree on my mum, but I couldn't so I decided to send the message to Edward anyway, it wasn't like one kiss could ruin – could ruin what? Seventeen years of friendship? Not unless you count seventeen years with an eleven year gap in the middle.

_'nice? i had a great time :] will c u soon xx' _He'd still put kisses! I rejoiced silently grinning to myself, within another few seconds my phone started ringing, I took a deep breath and answered,

"Hi Edward," I said cautiously.

"Hey Bella," he replied, his smooth velvet voice trickling through my phone. I could hear soft blues in the background of his room, I wondered what he was doing right then, "so, you are you going to admit what a great time you had too?"

I laughed quietly, remembering our company downstairs, "yeah, I did, I'm sorry about Jake though I-"

"No it's good," he said quickly, "I'm sorry about Tanya, she was completely out of order." he was talking quietly too, was…. she there?

"Will you thank your dad for me?"

"Thank him? Oh right, yes, you were out pretty solid, did Rose and Alice tell you?" I bit my lip, he'd got their names, that was a start. I nodded to his question but remembered he couldn't see me,

"Yeah, I'm really sorry about that, I hope he won't tell Charlie..." I trailed off, hoping he would get it.

"No he won't, he's pretty angry at me, apparently I'm responsible-"

This time I cut him off, "No!" I said a little too loudly, "I was just.."

I didn't have the words and he finished, not quite how I would have, but it worked nonetheless, "you were just having some fun. Look I've got to go,"

"Is Tanya there?" I asked quickly, regretting it at once.

"No no, my mum and dad are in the next room, we're eating supper." he didn't seem to put off by my comment, "So I'll see you around."

"Bye then."

It let a small smile creep to my face as I listened to the tone of the dead line. The small smile turned into a bigger smile, and eventually it was a very big smile. My eyes fluttered closed, ready for the next challenge life would bring.

**Hope you enjoyed that, I enjoyed it. Please review, even just to say hi =D**

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	9. Chapter 9

**I love this chapter it is my fave yet! And about two and a half thousand words for all those people who want longer chapters. Thanks for all the nice reviews, helpfully this should pretty much clear up what happened on Friday too. Enjoy! xo**

**Chapter 9**

I could hear people talking in hushed voices downstairs. Not wanting to be heard I pulled on some new clothes, dragged a brush though my hair and grabbed my bag before creeping downstairs. Due to my lack of co-ordination they still heard me though.

"Morning Bella," Charlie said.

"Morning Dad," I said, then acknowledged my mother, "Rene."

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"Going to Alice's. We're going to the movies in a bit."

"What? At seven thirty?" Rene laughed.

"Huh, guess I didn't look at the time," I replied icily. I was unsure what to do but I sure didn't want to spend another waking minute in the house.

"I'll be back later."

"Where are you going?" Charlie asked quickly, blocking off the front door.

"LaPlush," I said flatly, knowing he wouldn't refuse me.

Charlie stepped out my path, "Well say hi to Billy then," he said gruffly.

I wasn't yet sure I was going to see Jacob when I hit the ignition in my truck but I knew if I know didn't Charlie would find out and suspect I was up to something much worse than I was. So I drove slowly, wondering why exactly I was going, and what exactly I was going to say.

I still hadn't come up with an answer when I pulled up at Jake's house. By some stroke of luck I spotted his raincoat shoved in the passenger door of my truck.

"hey!" He said, running towards me, "I didn't know you were coming up. What's up?"

"Well you know," I started- "I found this," I gave him the jacket, eyeing the bruised on his cheek.

"Either the jacket or you just couldn't stay away from me?" he asked, "Do you even know what the time is?"

"Yeah whatever. You wanna see me or not?" I snapped back, climbing out the car, I had to pass a couple of hours before I could go to Alice's anyway.

"Sure. You want some coffee or something? It's probably a but early for soda, or vodka, whatever."

"Oi!" I said, hitting him with his own raincoat.

"mind the bruises!" he said mockingly, "not that it really hurts anyway."

Suddenly an idea hit me, I was still confused about Friday night, and it was probably best to get my facts straight before school tomorrow. Jacob was probably my best shot of doing just that.

"Hey Jacob, fancy telling me 'bout your Friday night?" I asked slowly, "I mean I know what I was up to, but what were you..."

He laughed, "I think we all know what you were up to. I left after a while, no offence but you were a little _pre-occupied _anyway."

"Huh, I guess I was." I said slowly, watching the purple bruise over his left eye. He put his hand up to it slowly noticing my staring.

"Oh, you want to know more about this?" I nodded and he started to explain, "Well after Cullen called you Bella we were staying out of each other's way-"

"And what's wrong with him calling me Bella?" I asked unthinkingly.

"Well what's wrong with me calling you Bella?" he came back. After a minute he continued, "But then the big guy, he'd been all over your little blonde friend all evening and-"

"I thought you didn't like Rose much anyway." I said, trying to calm myself.

"Yeah well, I don't think you'd be too happy if he, you know," Jake replied honestly, blushing a little at the corner's of his cheeks.

"Well actually they are together, so the next thing better be a good reason as to why you were fighting." I saved him from the embarrassment of going into the details.

"So anyway, the other one was eyeing Alice, she's not too bad," he added before I could comment on his attachment to her, "and the Cullen was practically stalking you, but still looked like he was mentally undressing every girl in the room!"

"And you weren't?" I teased.

Much to my surprise he turned ever redder. I smiled in satisfaction and prompted him to continue his story, "So why did you fight?"

"OK, you can stop being mean now. It was just about my fault, you know we don't get along and when he passed you another drink I told him it was a really dumb thing to do – not in those exact words but – so it wasn't all my fault. I mean you were _really_ hammered."

"I should know." I said, then paused, had he started a fight – because of me? My first response was that he had done a really sweet thing, and I wanted to hug him, but then... "And why don't you like _Edward _anyway?"

Jake shrugged, "Long story Bella, you know-"

"Bells," I hissed at him. On any normal day I would have rolled my eyes at his favourite excuse of a 'long story' but today I wasn't having it, "And why didn't you beat up Mike when we got me another punch? He looked like he was doing his fair share of feeling up too. What about Tyler, he got me a drink. I think Embry got me one at some point..." I trailed off.

Jake replied stiffly, "Well I doubt you were so out of your senses just when he gave you one."

I screamed softly, tugging at the ends of my hair, "Jacob, please, why did you start the fight?"

"I'm sorry Bells, I didn't know Cullen was your life-long friend." he shrugged.

I paused in my tracks, then sped up towards my truck, "Oh yeah? Well for your information I've been play mates with Edward for a lot longer than you!"

"Play mates? Yeah _play-mates_!" Jake shouted at me. I slammed my truck door and started to drive away nosily, drowning out the insults he was shouting at me.

It was almost nine by the time I was nearly back at Fawkes. I still didn't know everything that had happened on Friday, but I was sure I knew just about everything I needed to now. It had all been going well till Jake got there, I got drunk, he started a stupid fight, I kissed, and only kissed, Edward, then Tanya arrived, it all got a little messy. And that was pretty much it. Pretty much.

I stopped my car outside Alice's house and it was only then tears started to fall down my face, one for Jake, and what I'd said to him, a tear for Edward, what I hadn't said to him, but then I stopped crying. I wiped my eyes and straightened myself up.

My phone bleeped in my pocket, I noticed there were several more since last night, and a few fresh from Jake but I couldn't be bothered with any of them; instead I just opened the latest one from Alice. _Bella I can c u on my drive. Sorry cant do movie today. Talk lates xo. _

My face fell, I thought if anyone could, Alice could stitch me better. I had almost forgotten the awful situation at home when I'd been in LaPlush, not sure what to go I found myself whizzing along the roads, unsure of my destination for the second time that day.

Through fresh tears I could hardly see so I pulled over in a lay by just outside of the town. I wasn't sure how long I had been sitting in my truck when a silver car pulled up behind me and somebody climbed into the passenger seat next to me.

"Hey," Edward said softly, putting an arm round me.

I put my head onto his shoulder, wondering what to say, or if I should say anything, instead I just let out a small, involuntary sob. Luckily he decided to do some talking for now.

"I saw your truck here, it was pretty hard to miss actually," he said, a weak attempt at trying to make me laugh, "What's wrong? Did you run over a cat?"

I smiled slightly and shook my head.

"Well you didn't run over one of those bears then? That wouldn't be such a bad thing." He said, his deep green eyes gauging into me.

"No, sorry, I'm OK." I lied.

"I don't think you are." he said, his eye brows raised. For a minute we stayed like that, just looking into each other's eyes, his full of scepticism, and mine trying not to show sadness. Then he leant towards me, I could smell honey and expensive after shave then, I could taste it on my lips.

I lost track of time whilst he kissed me. All the thoughts I had been thinking flew out of my head and I let my self mould into him. Eventually he pulled away to let me breath.

"Better?" he asked, without a hint of cockiness.

I nodded and he leaned in to kiss me again but I put my hand up to stop him, "You can't keep doing that, not today, not last Friday."

"Why not?" he asked, his eyes crumpling at the corners.

"You've got Tanya," I said quietly.

"She doesn't matter." he smiled, "our little secret."

"Secret?" I whisper, wondering if Rose was right, and that being know as a boy-stealing-bitch was better than not being know, "but you wouldn't... brake up with her?" I asked, knowing the answer.

He shook his head, "probably not right now." his eyebrows were crumpled and he squeezed my hand sincerely.

"OK." I mumbled.

"OK?" he repeated.

"OK," I said again with confidence, "That's OK, I'm OK, you can get out my car now."

I watched Edward get out and he stood, staring at me through the window, "Don't do this Bella." he said softly.

"It's OK." I said with conviction and I drove off, leaving him stranding on the side walk.

I drove home and by some miracle Charlie and Rene were out 'bonding' or something. I lay on the sofa, silent tears falling and mindless sitcoms blurring in the background. Eventually I fell asleep.

***

When I woke up it was dark, I was still tired but I knew I would have to get up even if we wanted to catch the latest movie showing. I turned off my phone shutting it off from Edward's calls and texts. Presuming Alice was still pre-occupied today I drove straight to Rose's house.

As soon as I pulled into their extensive front yard I could hear shouting in from the house. I shut off the my engine and crept towards the house,

"Rosalie Lillian Hale!" Mrs Hale screamed, "What is going on with you?"

Rose didn't say anything and her dad took a turn at shouting, "What happened on Friday? Tell us Rosie baby!" his voice softened, "I don't want to lose my baby."

Rose sat still in the middle of their living room. Suddenly I saw a flash of red in the doorway, I knew Victoria, was watching too. Catching her eye quickly I knew she had seen me too and from the look on her face, whatever I did next it would be wrong to her.

"Mom, dad, please, I want to go now, nothing happened." Rose said firmly.

"Nothing? Nothing that a good cleaner couldn't cover?" Mr Hale stormed up and down the side of the room.

"It's fine. It was just us and a few friends, a little truth a dare, movies..." Rose trailed off, telling the truth, or at least some of it.

"Now you listen to me young lady, you and-" Mr Hale spat in Rose's face but she cut him off, standing up confidently.

"Sorry, I have to go now. Good night."

I knew Rose well, and I'd seen her have a go at her parents before and I could tell this was a _goodnight _as oppose to a just _goodnight I'm off to bed._ I ran back up the gravel towards my truck.

"Bells?" Rose called into the darkness. I turned slowly, waiting for her to shout at me too for spying, but it never came. She ran into my surprised arms, "Oh thank God Bells. You didn't head any of that did you? Oh good." She sobbed.

I helped her into my truck, "where do you want to go?" I asked, "my parents will probably be back so..."

Rose looked up at me and I remembered that my make-up was probably still running in streaks down my face, "Oh Bells, are you OK? Is it _your_ parents?"

I laughed without conviction, "partly, but that sounded just as bad honey."

She nodded, "let's go see Alice." before I needed to tell her she remembered, "oh yeah, she's busy isn't she – we've probably missed all the showings at the cinema haven't we?"

I nodded.

"What about your friend Jacob?" she asked unenthusiastically.

"Since when did you like him?" then I softened my tone, "I already went this morning, I don't think he'll appreciate another visit today."

"Oh." Rose said, understandingly, "Well let's go see the Cullens then!" she said with more enthusiasm in her voice. Before I could protest she got out her cell and dialled their number, "Hi, hi Emmett!" she cooed, "Yeah, could we come round? Sure! See you. Kiss kiss!" see sang, sounding better already.

"So we're going to..." I asked slowly, wondering if Edward would be in or if he'd be with Tanya.

"Oh yeah, I forgot you probably don't know the way much. Any more – I mean..." she stopped before she dug herself into a hole, "Look I'll just fix my make-up then I'll drive."

I nodded, I knew the way roughly. When I was little I went to play with Edwa-_him_ everyday after school and Charlie would pick me up after tea. I drove slowly, not excited about my first visit since I was six.

"OK I'm done," Rose said, she still sounded happier so I presumed we were still destined for the big house in the forest. She climbed over me into the driving seat, "you can fix yours now."

I complied, waving my hand out the window into the rain to wash the black circles under my eyes. Before I knew it we were pulling in. _A blast from the past? _Is that what this will be, just a visit for old times. _That's all it will be_; I told myself firmly.

**I feel so bad about leaving it on a cliff hanger there! Please review if you want the next chapter sooner! Xo**

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	10. Chapter 10

_**Hello there, hope you are having a very merry christmas! I am!!! Thank you to new beta – **__**tink3rb311ar3b3 – hope you like this chapter! It is long.... and hopefully just a little dramatic :] review, please, xo (aslo please read the A/N at the bottom, that one's more important)**_

_**yet another disclaimer: I am not stephanie meyer, it may seem blatantly obvious but apart from a little black book on my shelf and a (yummy) poster on my wall I own none of Twilight.**_

**Chapter 10**

Rose pulled up in front of the house and took an audible breath and got out the car, "Come on Bella, no one's gonna bite you." she said cheerily, as if the past hour hadn't happened.

I nodded, and sticking to my nonchalant resolution, I followed Rose to the front door of the big, white house.

The door was a dark, yet alluring, design of the perfect Esme Cullen. The windows were just how I remembered them. Pristine and shining, reaching from the top of the house to the bottom, yet still somehow they looked older than the woods themselves. I could hear voices from inside. Rose waited patiently, tapping her fingers on the cold hand rails, but my heart was fluttering erratically. Finally the talking stopped with a loud, booming laugh from who undoubtedly must have been Emmett and the door swung open.

"Hi honey!" he said, sweeping Rose into a crushing embrace, "Hey Bella." he added, his voice muffled by Rose's shoulder.

They took off upstairs and I was left in the big drawing room. I pushed the door shut and Jasper turned from the sofa.

"Oh, hey Bella!" he called, getting up; "I didn't know you were still there. Hey, um, Alice isn't here is she?"

"Sorry, no, just us." I didn't bother to ask if I could sit down, I was still working on the plan that this would be a once off visit back to the house in the woods.

Jasper walked out the room but I could still hear him talking, "No, that's OK; she said she was busy - you want some cookies?"

I smiled to myself; I had partly suspected Alice had blown Rose and I off to spend the day with Jasper. Not bothering to worry about Alice's apparent day with her grandparents, I accepted the offer of cookies and settled down to watch TV with Jasper. It was nice, although it had always been Edward and I, inseparable playmates. We had always found time to add the twins, Jasper and Emmett, in to our games. When we played pirates, they played our crew, and when we played families, they could be the babies. I smiled at the memory of Jasper in a little pink dress. Somehow, thinking about Edward, when I was sitting in his own sitting room, didn't hurt so much. It felt like whatever I thought, he would know, and I wasn't going behind his back if I said anything bad.

Jasper pulled me out my thoughts, "You're not really watching this, are you?" he asked, gesturing towards the TV.

"Well, sort of." I shrugged, "It's OK though, the cookies are good."

He smiled, "Esme made them before her and Carlisle went out."

"I didn't know they were out?" I said, posing it as a question, hoping to find out where the other absent member of his family was.

"Yeah, if they were in, Esme would probably want to see you anyway. She really missed you when Edward stopped playing with you so much." I was appreciative that he noticed it was Edward who stopped playing with me rather than the other way round.

I nodded, but it looked like Jasper was deciding whether or not to say something or not. Eventually he said slowly, "I wasn't really supposed to tell you, but Edward is in."

At first I was a little angry that he didn't want me to know, but I composed myself, "Why not?"

"Apparently he's a mess or something." Jasper laughed.

"_He's _a mess?" I muttered to myself ironically, then at a more conversational level asked, "What happened?"

"I think," Jasper said, through a mouthful of cookie, "that he broke up with Tanya."

I froze; I wasn't really sure what to think. I desperately wanted to go and see Edward. I had to know whether they broke up because _she_ knew about me, or because _he_ wanted me. As if Jasper knew that he idly added, "You can probably go see him if you like."

I nodded, "Thank Jasper, I'll get Alice to come round next time." He smiled, and I pulled my face into what I hoped was a friendly grin but probably looked distorted from my sudden panic.

It was no problem finding Edward's room. I settled outside it, listening to a classical piano piece float up from under the door. Suddenly it stopped and I could hear footsteps.

In a frenzy, wondering if I should hide, I tripped into the door. It swung open just in time and he caught me.

"Bella?" Edward asked, in a slightly confused voice.

"Um," I wondered just exactly what to say, "Jasper told me you were up here, or something."

He chuckled and I could hear the sound coming from his well toned stomach, "Did you hit your head or something? You're not quite coherent."

Edward swung me up and carried me into his room before placing me gently on a deep black sofa. It was only from the comfort of the dark leather I could see tear stains on his face.

"I'm sorry, Jasper, he said something about Tanya," as soon as I said it I regretted it, "I'm sorry."

"Yeah, turns out you were right." he muttered.

"About what?" I asked. Then it soaked in, "What, you mean...?" I trailed off.

He turned to me, his eyes a little red in the corners and his brow a little furrowed, "Do you really think I would ever cry for Tanya?" he asked, leaning a little closer to me, "No, you were right, I don't want you to be my little secret."

I expected him to kiss me; I wasn't sure why I expected that, it might have been how close he was, or just the atmosphere, but I was very surprised when he sat upright again. "I was crying for you. I blew it, and I'm crying because it's only now I realise I've lost the only one I wanted."

Edward gripped his nose in between his finger and thumb. I suppressed the urge to hit him out of pure frustration, "Well if you're meaning me," I started to snap, cooling my voice as soon as I heard myself though, "How on earth have you lost me? You've got me in just about every imaginable way."

He looked at me intensely for a minute, but as if to tell him I wasn't going anywhere, I stared him right back in the eye. I knew I had won when he grinned and wrapped his arms around me, "I guess I have got you now, and just so you know, I'm not gonna let you go."

"Who says I want to go?" I asked, twisting around in his firm grip to finally let him kiss me.

He laughed and pressed his lips to mine. My thought trail was lost and I concentrated on breathing in his warm scent. Finally, with another chuckle, he stopped kissing me,

"So, if I don't have to ever let you go, what will we tell Charlie?" he asked, a smile present in his voice.

"I don't wanna go home," I muttered into his chest.

"Oh really?" Edward traced circles on my back, and with or without an unwelcome mother at home; I was content to spend the rest of my life right there, "May I ask what was wrong this morning. I mean, only because I'm going to keep you here for so long?"

I stiffened, "Only if I can ask," I hesitated but had to know, "what happened with Tanya."

To my surprise his tone remained light and only the faintest trace of reluctantly was traceable, "Like I said, you were right; you are the one I want. Tanya never did mean much to me actually. When I told her I was ending things she guessed it was you -" he paused, probably editing the out the bits I didn't want to hear "- and then I came home, and you didn't arrive that long after."

I decided not to enquire further into the tale, but settled for his answer and listened to the soft sounds of his CD player bounce around his padded golden room.

"So," he broke the quiet, much to my annoyance, "were you going to tell me what happened this morning that made you so upset?"

I sighed, knowing he would get it out of me somehow, "I fought with Jacob and there was other stuff."

I raised his eyebrows, "Jacob Black?" he asked, "Figures, I didn't think he was a very good friend for you."

I turned around suddenly, my head rushing from the motion, "Excuse me? A very good friend for me? What exactly is that supposed to mean?"

"I just thought, a friend who beats up your boyfriend, isn't the best sort." Edward misinterpreted to my surprised face, "- I mean that's what we are? Boyfriend and girlfriend – or is that too soon for you?"

I cringed at the words, "No, fine, sure." I said quickly, "I just didn't expect you to say the bit 'bout Jacob." I had expected him to come up with the life-long enemies crap Jacob always fed me.

Edward raised his eyebrows again but made no comment. He shifted me back to a more comfortable position and asked, "So, by 'other stuff', what exactly did you mean?"

I didn't want him asking any more questions; I replied truthfully, "Harassing parents and you." I kissed him quickly and smiled as he tried to comment with my lips pressed onto his.

After what didn't seem like very long Jasper knocked on the door, "Whoa, I didn't think we were still such great playmates."

I blushed and remembered what Jacob had said that morning. Edward still seemed comfortable, "Hey Jazz."

"It's past midnight and mom and dad will be home soon Edward, so Bella and Rose should be headed off probably. We don't want officer Swan coming round." he joked.

I smiled, "Thanks Jasper, but you might have more problems getting Rose away."

"No, I gave them a warning ten minutes ago, so hopefully they're OK now." he grinned.

"I hope you shielded your eyes when you went into his room." Edward said, with some level of seriousness. We got up and walked downstairs, him still holding my hand.

"Don't worry, I considered wearing safety goggles but as it turned out, they weren't being too bad. For him." Jasper jumped down that last few stairs.

"Bells?" Rose called from round the corner by the door, she took a swift glance at Edward and myself, "Nice to see you made up." she grinned a little wider, "it's time to go now or your dad will be round here any minute with a shot gun."

Rose turned to say bye to Emmett and I kissed Edward, "Till tomorrow." he said softly, and surprisingly, tomorrow really felt like a really long time away.

"Say hi to Esme," I called to Jasper, "and say thanks for the cookies."

"Sure! Bye Bella, bye Rose." He called, standing in the door frame with Edward and Emmett. The second the thick wood slammed shut I heard loud scuffling as they tried to sort themselves out for when their parents got back.

Safely back in my car I took a deep breath and considered the evening, "Charlie's gonna kill me." I said, with a considerable amount of cheeriness.

Rose laughed, "Well, if he's gonna kill you, just imagine what _my _parents will do."

I hesitated, wondering whether I would be in much trouble, on balance I decided Rose was well worth it, "You could come and stay the night if you like?"

Rose paused too, obviously not sure what to say. The past week hadn't been so straight forward for us but she too thought of her parents and nodded, "Yes please, you have no idea but you probably just saved my life."

"All in a day's work," I grinned.

We stopped off at her house on the way back so she could grab some things, "I'll be ten minutes maximum, my parents should be asleep -" she paused, looking around her extensive house, "keep quiet, and if you see anyone else start the truck – I'm pretty sure I'll hear it – and I'll come straight down."

I watched Rose creep in the side door and wondered if this was some sort of secret mission rather than just grabbing your toiletries. I thought idly about Edward, and wondered what he was doing. I had been sitting in the truck more than quarter of an hour when I saw Rose stagger out of her house. She climbed in and slammed the door.

I clocked Rose's face as we drove through the empty high street and past the silent high school. "What's wrong Rose? Was it your parents?"

It took a moment, but she finally exhaled and turned to me, her eyes wide, "Victoria," she whispered, "She's going to kill me."

"What?" I shouted, slamming on the brakes, then commended in a lower voice, "No, she must just have been saying that, don't worry about it."

"No," Rose insisted, her voice no more than breathing, "she's going to kill me, then Alice, then you."

I shook my head, refusing to believe, "No, she doesn't know me. She won't."

Suddenly Rose snapped, "Yes, she will," she said harshly, but she didn't cry, "She gave me option one, your stupid mother! And so what did I say, _'oh yeah, just go kill my best friend's mother?' _and then there was them," my breath caught, just on the assumption of who she meant, "or us. And it was too late to go back. She just went, and told me I had a week, maximum."

Finally a tear fell down her perfect complexion and I restarted the truck's engine, "Come on, let's get you to bed. She can't have meant it, maybe she had something to drink, she has no reason to."

Rose, her voice still rough, came out in staggered sentences, "No. She said that if I wasn't reason enough, you were. You said something, yesterday; I don't know what Bells but I swear you gotta tell me. She said they said that-"

"Who are they?" I asked.

"James and Laurent." Suddenly the name my mother said clicked. Laurent had been the man abusing my mother.

"She said, that they told her who you were and how to get to you and your mother." Rose said. "Laurent _was_ her father and James is... I'm not sure," Rose admitted. "She said James had been so close to your mom though, he nearly had her in Phoenix." Rose stifled a sob, "Victoria said it would have been easier for us if he had."

By now we were outside my house, I put my arm around Rose and helped her out the cab of the truck.

"Rose," I said, picking my words carefully, "I think I know who Laurent is, he was with my mum, but he abused her. And I don't know how she got out of it..." suddenly it was Rose supporting me. I couldn't even think it. What if my mom was a.._._ What if she was, and my dad was in the house with her, I was about to take one of my best friends into the same rooms. _What if she was a murderer?_

Telling myself not to be silly, and even if she was, he _was_ abusing _her_. I reached for the keys under the eaves and let us in. Rose was so tired she hardly made it up the stairs and collapsed on my bed, so not wanting to disturb her I made a nest on the floor with pillows and settled down to sleep, but I couldn't.

Silently, so silently, I crept downstairs to the kitchen and pulled out a knife from the block. On the message pad under Charlie's messy note from earlier that day he'd scribbled another, '_Gone to bed Bells, I guess you're still with Jake – I didn't call Billy, your mom said I should give a growing girl some privacy. Well that's fine, Jake's a nice lad. Night, dad.' _I felt a little gratefulness for my mother, knowing that I would have been in huge trouble had Charlie called Billy. I ripped the page off the note pad a gripped the knife, nervously I tiptoed up the stairs.

"Bella?" I spun around, holding the knife out.

Renee's eyes widened in surprise, "You want to tell me what's going on?"

"My draws are stuck," I lied vaguely, then realising how stupid I must sound, I started to run back upstairs, "Actually, why don't _you_ tell me what's going on?"

I slammed the door and slid down the wood, listening to my heart pounding. My phone vibrated from across the room '_miss you already. Edward xx_' read the text. I held it close, wondering if he would ever guess the mess I was in.

_**Bye, bye, please review - it makes me update sooner :D yay! (I think) say hi, or tell me what you're getting for christmas... or show off if you've already broken up from school. I don't really care, just tell me what you think – and thanks to those who already have! Love you all, may your Christmas (or Hanukha – which could some one tell me how you pronounce? Because I say one way and my friend says another....) anyway, may your holidays be merry (if I don't update again within the next week, which hopefully I will) bye again xox**_


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